Book: My Boyfriend Barfed in My Handbag . . . and Other Things You Can't Ask Martha

Previous: Acknowledgments
Book main: Foreword

Index

The page numbers in this index refer to the printed version of this book. To find the corresponding locations in the text of this digital version, please use the “search” function on your e-reader. Note that not all terms may be searchable.

abrasives, 5–6

activated charcoal, 185–86

air-conditioning units, 68–69

alcohol, isopropyl, 119

all-purpose spray cleaners, 5

ammonia

and bleach, 12

for greasy/sticky surfaces, 6, 12, 33, 58–59

antiperspirants and deodorants, 162, 179

ants, 15

appliances, 38–39

area rugs, 69–71

automobiles, 191–204

cleaning the exterior, 191–95

cleaning the interior, 195–200

odor management, 200–204

baby wipes, 106, 159

bacteria, 81, 83–84

Bad Air Sponge, 201

baking soda, 27

for cutting boards and storage containers, 21

and hard water, 74

for stain treatments in laundry, 164

barf-stained handbags, 224–25

Bar Keepers Friend, 5–6

Barker, Doug, 118

bathrooms, 72–88

clogged drains, 84–88

and hard water, 73–74, 76

mold, mildew and bacteria in, 81–84

odors in, 77–81

shower curtains, 84

toilet brushes, 76–77

toilets, 75–76, 78–79, 87–88

beard trimmers, 115

bedding, 169–75

grease-stain removal, 207–8

lube-stain removal, 206–8

pee-stain removal, 210–11

semen-stain removal, 211–12

skid-mark removal, 208–10

bleach, 146

and ammonia, 12

and protein stains, 146, 210, 211–12

blenders, 39

blood stains, 119, 159–61, 174–75

bluing, 146–47

Bon Ami, 5

bongs, 218–20

Borax, 209–10

boric acid, 15

boy smell, 221–22

bras, 175–79

bread, sliced, 27

bugs, 13–16, 172

butcher block surfaces, 10

cabinets, 11–12

carpeting, 69–71

removing bong-water stains from, 219–20

removing frosting from, 138

removing nail polish stains from, 114–15

cars. See automobiles

Cascade, 132

cashmere, 148, 181–82

ceiling fans, 69

ceilings, 55–57, 60, 62

centipedes, 16

chalk, 167

china, caring for, 126–27

cleaning rags, laundering, 156–58

clear nail varnish, 119

clogged drains, 84–88

clothes

coats, 183–85

dress shields, 164–65

gym clothes, 155, 189–90

slips, 165

smoke odors in, 220

staticky clothes, 119

ties, 133

wedding dress restoration projects, 121–25

See also fabrics; laundry

club soda, 27

clutter, 8–9

coats, 183–85

cockroaches, 15

coffeemakers, 38

Comet, 5

cornmeal, 27, 167

cornstarch, 27, 167

countertops, 2, 10–11

crystal, caring for, 128

curling irons, 94–95

cutting boards, 21

damp mopping, 51–52

Dawn dish soap, 6

degreasers, 5, 6

delicates, 147–48, 156, 175–79

denture tablets, 119

deodorants and antiperspirants, 162, 179

desiccants, 80

detergents

detergent pods, 142–43

in high efficiency machines, 151–52

liquid versus powered, 141–42

for silk, 180

specialty detergents, 147–48

dishes, 17–19

china, 126–27

crystal, 128

daily cleaning of, 2

silver, 129–31

dish towels, 19

dishwashers, 19–20

DivaCup care, 217–18

Dobie pads, 22

drains, clogged, 84–88

Drano, 86

dress shields, 164–65

dry-clean and dry-clean-only items

cashmere, 148, 181–82

leather strap-ons, 217

and stain treatments, 146–47, 158, 159

wool, 148, 182–85

See also silks

dryers, 153–54

dry mopping, 49–50

dust mites, 172

dye stains, 63–64

Easy-Off oven cleaner, 28

electric kettles, 38

electronics, sanitizing, 119

enamel stovetops, 31

Engleside Home Care Products, 122

eyelash curlers and combs, 107

eye pencil sharpeners, 105

fabrics

linens, 121–23

silks, 106, 123–24, 148, 179–81

wool, 148, 182–85

See also clothes; leather; stains

fabric softeners, 148–50

faucets, 74

fecal stains, 208–10

flat irons, 94–95

floor mats, automobile, 195–97

floors, 41–55

carpeting and area rugs, 69–71, 114–15, 138, 219–20

damp mopping, 51–52

dry mopping, 49–50

dye stains on, 63–64

linoleum flooring, 48, 55

scrubbing on your hands and knees, 53–54

steam mopping, 52

sweeping, 49

tile and grout flooring, 46–48, 55

wood and laminate flooring, 43–46, 54–55

food, 3, 27

food processors, 39

food storage containers, 21

formica surfaces, 10

fouling, 73

freezers, 25, 26

fruit flies, 14

garbage disposals, 20–21

glass stovetops, 31–32

gloves, 6

glue, removing, 119

granite surfaces, 10

grease stains, 165–68

in bed linens, 207–8

in clothes, 27

in leather upholstery, 198, 203–4

greasy surfaces

ammonia for, 6, 12, 58–59

vent hoods, 32–33

grinders, electric, 39

grooming and hygiene, 89–119

beard trimmers, 115

electric toothbrushes, 116–17

eyelash curlers and combs, 107

flat/curling irons, 94–95

hairbrushes, 91–94

hair dryers, 97–98

hair dye disasters, 98–101

hot combs, 96–97

hot rollers, 95–96

makeup brushes, 101–4

makeup spills and stains, 105–7

makeup sponges, 104–5

manicure/pedicure tools, 111–12

menstrual cups, 217–18

mouth guards and retainers, 117–19

nail polish stains, 112–15

pencil sharpeners, 105

pumice stones, 111

razors, 110–11

shower poufs, loofahs, and sponges, 109–10

skin and body care tools, 107–9

velcro rollers, 96

gym clothes, 155, 189–90

hair-care tools

beard trimmers, 115

flat/curling irons, 94–95

hairbrushes, 91–94

hair dryers, 97–98

hair dye disasters, 98–101

hairspray, 119

hot combs, 96–97

hot rollers, 95–96

velcro rollers, 96

hand and body lotion, 119

handbags, barfed-in, 223

hands-and-knees method of floor cleaning, 53–54

hard water, 73–74, 76

harness care, 216–17

hosiery, 156

hot combs, 96–97

hot rollers, 95–96

hydrogen peroxide, 119, 164

hygiene products. See grooming and hygiene

ink stains, 119, 160, 168

Innofresh, 186

isopropyl alcohol, 119

jewelry

costume jewelry, 119, 126

wedding jewelry, 125–26

juicers, 39

ketchup, 27

kitchens, 1–40

appliances, 38–39

cleaning products and tools for, 5–7

clutter in, 8–9

countertops, 2, 10–11

cutting boards and storage containers, 21

daily cleaning of, 2–3

dishwashers, 19–20

foodstuffs used in cleaning, 27

freezers, 25–26

full monty hard cleaning of, 11–16

garbage disposals, 20–21

giant messes in, 3

greasy and/or sticky surfaces in, 6, 12, 32–33, 58–59

hard cleaning of, 3–11

melted plastic, 33–35

microwave ovens, 35–36

ovens, 28–30

pantry cleaning, 11–13

refrigerator cleaning, 21–23

refrigerator organization, 23–24

kitchens (cont.)

sinks and dishes, 16–19

stovetops, 30–32

toaster ovens, 37–38

vent hoods, 32–33

lady business. See grooming and hygiene

Laffy Taffy extraction, 206

laminate flooring, 43–46, 54–55

laundry, 140–90

cleaning rags, 156–58

delicates, 147–48, 156, 175–79

detergents (see under laundry products)

dryer settings, 153–54

gym clothes, 155, 189–90

hand washing items, 175–85

Laffy Taffy extraction, 206

mildewed laundry, 187–89

odors, 185–87, 189–90

oversized items, 169–75

separating laundry, 155–58

special loads in, 152–53

stain treatments, 145–46, 158–68 (see also stains)

vinegar in, 149

washers, 150–53

water temperatures, 152–53

whitening agents, 146–47

See also dry-clean and dry-clean-only items

laundry products

bleach, 146

bluing, 146–47

detergent pods, 142–43

fabric softeners, 148–50

liquid versus powered detergents, 141–42

soap nuts, 143–45, 152

specialty detergents, 147–48

stain treatments, 145–46, 161–69

leaching surfactant, 60–62

leather

barf-stained handbags, 224–25

leather upholstery, 197–98, 203–4

odor management for, 224–25

stain management for, 167

strap-on care, 216–17

lemons, 27

Lestoil, 166

linen fabric, 121–23

linens, 131–32. See also bedding

linoleum, 10, 48, 55

lip pencil sharpeners, 105

lipstick stains, 106, 107, 119

loofahs, 109–10

lotion, 119

lube stains, 206–8

Magic Erasers, 23, 57

makeup

makeup brushes, 101–4

makeup sponges, 104–5

spills and stains from, 105–7, 119

manicure/pedicure tools, 111–12

marble surfaces, 11

mascara stains, 106

mattress stains, 210–11

melted plastic, 33–35

menstrual cups, 217–18

mice, 16

microwave ovens, 35–36

mildew, 81–84

in automobiles, 201

in laundry, 187–89

odors from, 80

mineral oils, 166

mold, 81–84

in automobiles, 201

in bathrooms, 81–84

on the ceiling, 57

in laundry machines, 151–52

odors from, 80

mopping

damp mopping, 51–52

dry mopping, 49–50

steam mopping, 52

moths, 14

Mötsenböckers Lift Offs, 113, 167

mouth guards and retainers, 117–19

Mrs. Meyer’s dish soap, 18

mud stains, 136, 160

mushrooms, 59–60

nail polish

clear nail polish, 119

nail polish remover, 119

nail polish stains, 112–15

odors

in automobiles, 200–204

in barf-stained handbags, 224–25

in bathrooms, 77–81

from bong-water, 219–20

in carpeting, 219–20

in laundry, 185–87, 189–90

products for, 79–80

from smoke, 124, 220

and vodka, 27

olive oil, 27

ovens, 28–30, 33–34

OxiClean, 53, 134–35, 163–64

Palmolive dish soap, 18

pantry cleaning, 11–13

paper towels, 12

pee-stain removal, 210–11

perspiration stains, 122–23, 161–65

pet-accident stain treatments, 211

Pine-Sol, 166

pipes, glass, 219

plants, 80

plastic, melted, 33–35

potatoes, 27

pumice stones, 111

radiators, 65–67

rags, cleaning, 156–58

razors, 110–11

refrigerators, cleaning and organizing, 21–24

roaches, 15

rubbing alcohol, 119

rugs, 69–71

rust stains, 76

salt, 27

scale, 73

Scrubbing Bubbles, 72

sex

semen stains, 138–39, 211–12, 222–23

sex-toy care, 212–15

strap-on care, 216–17

sheets. See bedding

shoes, caring for, 137

showers

poufs, loofahs and sponges, 109–10

shower curtains, 84

showerheads, 74

silks

caring for, 148

smoke odors in, 124

stain management for, 106, 123–24

washing, 179–81

silver, caring for, 129–31

silverfish, 15

skid marks, 208–10

skin and body care tools, 107–9

slips, 165

smoke, odors from, 124, 220

snakes for unclogging drains, 86–88

soap nuts, 143–45, 152

soap scum, 74

sodium carbonate, 74

Soft Scrub, 5

spiders, 16

sponges, 18–19

Stain Devils, 167

stainless steel surfaces, 10, 31–32

stains, 145–46, 158–68

in automobiles, 197, 202–4

baby wipes for, 106, 159

barf-stained handbags, 224–25

blood stains, 119, 159–61, 174–75

on bras, 178–79

and Cascade, 132

and Engleside, 122

grease stains, 27, 165–68, 198, 203–4, 207–8

hair dye stains, 98–101

ink stains, 119, 160, 168

lipstick stains, 106, 107, 119

lube stains, 206–8

from makeup, 105–7

mattress stains, 210–11

and Mötsenböckers Lift Offs, 113, 167

mud stains, 136, 137, 160

nail polish stains, 112–15

perspiration stains, 122–23, 161–65

protein stains, 170, 172–73, 208–10, 211–12, 222–23

in refrigerators, 23

rust stains, 76

semen stains, 138–39, 211–12, 222–23

skid marks, 208–10

and Stain Devils, 167

tannin stains, 168

wax stains, 132

and WD-40, 204

wine stains, 27, 119, 132–35

steam cleaners

for carpet cleaning, 71

for odor management, 186–87

for stain removal, 223

steam mopping, 52

sticky messes, 12, 58–59

stovetops, 30–32

strap-on care, 216–17

sweat stains, 122–23, 161–62

sweeping, 49

Tabasco, 27

table linens, 131–32

talcum powder, 167

tannin stains, 168

tea kettles, 38

ties, 133

tile surfaces, 10, 46–48, 55

toaster ovens, 37–38

toasters, 39

toilets

cleaning, 75–76

clogs in, 87–88

and odor management, 78–79

and toilet brushes, 76–77

toothbrushes, electric, 116–17

top-to-bottom cleaning, 8

towels, 155

trisodium phosphate (TSP), 61–62

upholstery

in automobiles, 197–98, 202–3

removing boy-smell from, 222

removing nail polish stains from, 114–15

removing semen stains from, 222–23

urine stains, 210–11

vacuums, 49, 70

vases, cleaning, 119

velcro rollers, 96

vent hoods, 32–33

vinegar, white, 27

for kitchen cleaning, 5, 22

for stain treatments in laundry, 163

vodka, 27

vomit-stained handbags, 224–25

walls, 55–63

washers, 150–53

washing soda, 74

wax stains, 132

WD-40, 204

weddings, 120–39

stain-treatment strategies, 132–39

wedding dress restoration projects, 121–25

wedding jewelry, 125–26

wedding shoes, 137

Windex, 5

wine stains, 27, 119, 132–35

wood and laminate flooring, 43–46, 54–55

wool, 148, 182–85

Previous: Acknowledgments
Book main: Foreword